(sighs) All right, I guess I could text Lois. We have a large array of medical-grade cranes and pulleys that lift him. I always eat dinner with Lois.Īw, you sure? You can sit in Joe’s dining harness if you like. You want to stay for dinner?Īh, man, I’d love to, but it’d be wrong. You know, I usually cook for one-and-a-half, but Joe’s still on his stakeout. Well, I made it in the oven, not the microwave. That’s how I always know to run into the kitchen, shove a napkin in my shirt and hold my utensils upright at the table. So that’s how I became Quahog’s first ninja cop. Tomorrow’s Chris’s Career Day, and Joe’s hat is a key element of what I do. What? Honey, the chocolate milk is the snack. What? You mean I played with the Play-Doh everyone you ever played Play-Doh with played with? I’ve been played!Ĭan I have a chocolate milk with my snack today, please? I just think you should get tested, okay? (“Bread and Butter” by The Newbeats playing) Huge, if true.Īctually, Stewie, there’s something important I sorta need to talk to you about. I heard there’s a special feature on the Blu-ray that’s just Diane Keaton shrieking the commentary. Nobody’s walking outta here with First Wives Club on Blu-ray, okay? Nice as that sounds. Are you sure this isn’t about you not being able to perform on your anniversary? ‘Cause Brian’s old now and can’t satisfy women through intercourse. Yeah, I turned the pages into toilet paper. On the positive side, Brian’s latest book was a real page-turner. That’s sort of just another jab at my penis, but sure.
PETER BECOMES AN UBER DRIVER HOW TO
You know, I hear he can’t even bury a bone these days without Viagra.Īnd they say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but I heard Brian just learned how to roll over and beg… for an erection. Born on the highway, because that is where most accidents happen.īut we’re here to talk about Brian getting another year older. Welcome to the roast portion of the evening. Now he’s gonna be late, but he’s going to make it seem like the passenger’s fault and not his. Next, he’s gotta pick up a ride share customer. Now I’m gonna be up all night, watching bad reality TV.ĪNNOUNCER: We now return to Uber Driver: Ninja Warrior.ĪNNOUNCER: First, he’s gotta swing on the gold chains across the cologne bath without dropping his e-cigarette. Was anybody gonna wake me up for the party? It’s 6:30. “Those who doubt the wand’s power suffer the wand’s wrath.” Leviticus 26:12. Old Joe’s got a big stakeout this week, so I’m gonna practice by watching the party from across the street. It also says, “Love, Aunt Judy and Uncle Bob.”Ī joke that good doesn’t celebrate just one birthday.
On the front it says, “Too much sex ruins your eyesight” and on the inside it says, “Happy Birthday,” but all blurry-Oh! I gave it away! I pointed it at a bus, the bus crashed, that’s all I’m saying. Uh, Joe, isn’t that the same stick we gave you for your wedding?
Wow, thank you! I’m gonna take it into the kitchen and I don’t foresee having any issues with that. Hey, happy birthday, Brian! Bonnie and I got you a big stick. Why spend money on something he can’t even comprehend? I think it’s ridiculous to have a party for a dog. Sorry, I spaced on your name at the party store.
♪ Lucky there’s a man who positively can do ♪ ♪ But where are those good old-fashioned values ♪ After Peter storms out when asked about the network’s broadcast time change of the show, Chris takes over and brags about the cost of the suit he’s wearing. The final scene shows Peter doing a press conference, answering questions about what happened this week and a question on if there will be another Peter and Bonnie episode. He eventually comes clean only to find that Lois doesn’t care about what he did as it makes things easier for her. Although he continues to eat behind his family’s back, Peter has trouble keeping what happened at the Swansons’ a secret, viewing it as an affair of sorts. When Peter tries to find him at his house, Bonnie offers him to stay for dinner where he becomes addicted to her cooking and is unable to enjoy what Lois makes. Meanwhile, Joe goes away on a stakeout after Brian’s tenth birthday party. He eventually heads to Burlington to get put down, but Brian talks him out of it by stating that he should just feel lucky to be alive and value whatever time he has left, even going so far as to eat the tainted Play-Doh in solidarity. Stewie makes several attempts to become at peace with his death and raise awareness of his disease, but Brian won’t take him seriously. Doug, who is playing doctor, backs up her claim and states that he is terminal. Stewie learns that he has cooties after sharing the Play-Doh with a girl in his class.
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